Procedures, Prayer and Peace - Pappy's Pen #07

*Note - This article was not written by New John Simmons, but by a contributing writer named Pappy. This post is part of a continuing series called Pappy’s Pen where he writes about his family, faith and recent cancer diagnosis. *

*Note - This article was not written by New John Simmons, but by a contributing writer named Pappy. This post is part of a continuing series called Pappy’s Pen where he writes about his family, faith and recent cancer diagnosis.*

I think things are finally getting to me.  I am feeling very fatigued lately, and I am pretty sure it is not caused by anything physically I am doing or not doing.  I think it is stress and emotionally based.  All the waiting is adding up. 

It has been about 3 months since I first learned cancer was a possibility, and 1 month since I received the positive biopsy results.  Positive as in yes I have cancer.  I am still looking forward to a procedure where the doctor places gold markers in my prostate.  It will be 2 weeks after that before I get my “fitting”, where a body mold is made to hold me in the same position for my radiation treatments.  2 weeks after that I start my treatment, which will last for 2 weeks.  That all adds up to another 8 weeks until this is over.  And there is nothing I can do except wait and prep.

For the next procedure, I will be put under at a local surgery center and the doctor will place 3 gold markers in my prostate and also insert a dissolving gel to create a barrier between my prostate and rectum.  The purpose is to help hold the prostate in place and to create a barrier so the radiation doesn’t create rectal burning.  Imagine having second degree burns inside your rectum.  Use lots of gel doc.  Junk in the trunk. Please.

groceryclerk.jpg

I have to self-administer another enema before this procedure.  Yes, I will be trying to break my previous record.  I will have lots of opportunity to go for a personal best.  I will need an enema before each of the 7 next visits.  My wife wants to know if we should buy the enemas online or if I will feel embarrassed to buy that many at the store.  I also need to get milk of magnesia and Gas X for future visit preps.  Imagine my shopping cart.  In my mind the best thing I can do is let a big one rip as I am paying.  Can’t wait to see the look on the checkers face.

On a more humorous note I have some friends who are praying for my wife and me.  They are praying that God would bless us with a small surprise each day, to show His love and concern for us.  The morning that I learned they were praying this I was reading the newspaper.  There was a coupon insert in it with a coupon for $1 off Gas X, which I had learned the day before I would need.  I texted my friend to let him know I received my first small surprise blessing in the form of a $1 coupon.  Doesn’t God work in mysterious ways?

God’s word tells us that we who are weary and heavy-laden can come to Him and receive rest.  I am weary.  I am also feeling heavy-laden.  I received some disturbing news about my parents health that I won’t go into here, but it appears I won’t be buying any more Mother’s Day or Father’s Day gifts.  Or probably this will be the last year I do. 

This is shaping up to be a really crappy year.  And yet, because of the love and concern of family and friends, I feel a certain peace.  I can’t explain it.  I know things are completely out of my control.  But I know things are in His control, and I am ok.  I will be ok.  My body is tired, my mind is going a million places, but my spirit is at peace.

Please keep praying, not just for me but for the wife, kids, and grandkids.  I can control, the only thing I can control, is how I react to what’s going on around me.  I can’t control how this is affecting them.  I wish and pray that I could protect them, that this wasn’t affecting them, but that is not in my power.  One of my young grandsons asked me the other day if I was feeling better.  They know something is going on but they really don’t understand.  I want to shield them from the bad things in this life but can’t.  So please pray for them.  Thanks.

To Learn more about Testimony House click here. To Partner with Testimony House and our mission to lead the lost to Christ and help others find God’s plan for their lives click here.


 Keep Reading Other Blogs from Testimony House Contributors