Getting the News...It's Cancer - Pappy's Pen #04
I received the results of my biopsy today. I have prostate cancer. It is very low grade, caught very early, is not particularly aggressive, so therefore very treatable. I got the call from my doctor early in the day while at work. Surprisingly I had peace with the news. I did not want to tell my wife or family over the phone, so I avoided texting with them or calling them because I knew they would ask.
The doctor also sent the pathology report and a “what’s the next step” type email to my medical history website, which I share with my wife. She was checking the site for billing info while balancing the checkbook and saw the email, so she also got the news. She also did not want to discuss it over the phone so she was avoiding calling or texting me that day. But she also was at peace, especially after reading her devotion for the day which talked about being in God’s hand and trusting His wisdom for our lives even in the midst of trials.
I have an appointment in a few days to go over treatment options with the doctor. I am doing some research before that appointment to get familiar with what is out there, and have heard from a few others about their treatments, but I am going to keep an open mind and with my wife decide on what we think makes sense for us. Any prayers you might throw our way for wisdom would be greatly appreciated.
Speaking of prayers, I know many people, many good and righteous and believing people were praying for a complete healing and a clean report. Some might question why that didn’t happen. Had I done something to deserve God’s punishment? Does God not answer prayers? Why is there disease and suffering for God’s people? Does He not love us? Is God vindictive? I have known people who think that Christians should live a “blessed” life of favor, that bad things happen to us only because we have sinned in some way and are being punished.
I don’t think that is what the Bible teaches. The God I serve is not like that. His ways are not my ways, His thoughts are not my thoughts. He is the creator and sustainer of the universe, the beginning and the end. He knows what the future holds and He knows me and what I can handle. He knows what I need to grow closer to and more like Him, and He knows what those I come in contact with need also. I have given Him control of my life when I asked Him to be my LORD, and I must trust Him whatever I am going thru.
I know that sin, disease, and death entered this life when Adam and Eve sinned, and I freely admit I am still a sinner at heart. I am not yet made perfect. Sin, disease, and death are still active in this age. Christ has defeated these things, but we aren’t there yet. So we still have to bear the consequences of mans, and our, fall. But that doesn’t mean He doesn’t hear or care. My family was praying that what the doctor felt during his exam of me was a fatty cyst, or fatty deposit. As my son in law said “we are praying for fat”. Well, between that prayer session and my biopsy I gained 8 pounds in 1 week. We got fat! Yet somehow that spoke to me. God knows my personality, knows my warped sense of humor. He knows that would cause me to laugh, cause me to know He is there and listening and tweaking me a little.
I am thinking of the man who was healed by Peter and James in Acts 3. He had been lame for 40 years and had often been brought to the temple by the beautiful gate. How many times had he been there begging when Jesus was teaching in the temple yard? How many times had he heard of Jesus and the healings that were taking place? Had Jesus ever walked by him on His journeys thru Jerusalem? Had Jesus walked by him while he was begging at the beautiful gate? And yet, despite many others being healed by Jesus, this man was not healed by Jesus. Why not? Because God had something else in store for him.
Who knows what God has in store for me and my family? Instead of wishing for what could have been and complaining about what wasn’t I have to focus on what is and what will be. I don’t know what that is but I know who does. And I trust Him completely.
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